Monday, April 30, 2007

Feeling better now

Thanks so much for your kind words, it helped me feel a little more normal and a little less neurotic lol to know there are other people who understand those feelings. Its funny the power of putting your thoughts out there though, once they are out of my head and in writing it allows me to stop stressing over the thoughts relentlessly, and just get on with things.

This morning I took him to the bus, all of his mates were waiting for him, he was really excited, and his teachers were all acting so normally it was easy to let go. A sign of how much closer he is to being a teenager was the fact that he grudgingly hugged me goodbye, rather than giving a heartfelt hug, but I guess a guy has to keep face in front of his mates ;-)

All of the excitement of the morning rubbed off on me a bit too, I could feel it in the air, I dont think too many of them got a good nights sleep last night, all too busy anticipating the big day. I am just glad that I wont have to spend the next four hours on the bus with them - I'd need a va1ium after that for sure!

The weekend here was really laid back, and we had RAIN! I had forgotten how lovely it was to stay inside with a good book while the rain slides down the windows outside.

Today I am volunteering in my daughters kindergarten class. I have twenty two cute little kits all made up on my scrapping desk, and KE are making Mothers Day cards after lunch today. I tried to keep the design really simple, but still cute, so hopefully they will like it. My daughter is really excited about me coming in to her classroom, so at least one of my children still wants to be known to me in public lol.

Better go now, I have lots of blog reading to catch up on before I head out. Will post pictures tomorrow of the cards we make today.

Cheers

Friday, April 27, 2007

Anxiety

You know that feeling... tight chest, rapid breathing, rolling stomach, quicksilver thoughts, and that general feeling of not feeling right?

I cant seem to shake it this week. I have spend ages each night struggling with it before falling asleep, then it is there again when I wake for just a split second before the morning mayhem starts. My son is going to school camp next Monday. He will be gone for five days and four nights. That is the longest he has ever been away from home, ever. And I am not coping with it quite as well as I thought I would.

Up until now each time he has stayed away from home he has been only a few streets away, or with his grandparents. This time he will be two hours drive away, with people I dont know, and with a couple of teachers from his school and his friends.

He is so excited, and I wish that I could share that with him, but its so hard letting go, he's my first born.

I know its stupid to get this anxious about it, and I know kids do this all the time, and they have a great time, and they come home safely, and I am being a big wuss, so feel free to tell me to take a deep breath and get a grip, because I have been saying the same thing to myself all week :) and if you feel so inclined send out a thought to the universe that my boy has the best time at camp and comes home safely. Thanks.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Addendum to the Pantry Saga

Hi I know I've been away for a while, I went to Sydney to spend a week with my family before they move out of my childhood home. There were moments of intense joy, I was able to spend time with my two newest nieces and get to know them a bit, and there were moments of sweet sadness. The home I grew up in is soon to house a new family. I am so glad I had the chance to say goodbye to the old house.

My nieces are just too beautiful for words, born in November and December last year, they are both contented happy little souls, and it was such a pleasure spending time with them.

We had a dinner last Wednesday night with my parents. The kids were all put to bed, or sent out to watch a video in the rumpus room while Mum, Dad, myself, my brother and two sisters sat down for dinner together for the first time in ages, and the last time in our old home. Usually we have all the extras, husbands and aunties and uncles and kids, this meal we decided was just for us. I am so glad we did it.

The funny thing about this is that Mum and Dad are not actually moving far, they have subdivided their block of land, and are building a new house on the new block. They will have a new street address, but will only really be just over the fence from the old house. It will seem really weird going to the new house and seeing stranger in our old backyard.

I am proud to say that while I was there I didn't do the old pantry thing. This is the pantry where all of my pantry bingeing habits started, last week it was just like any other old cupbard to me. I didn't scope it out to see what treats were lurking there. I was very proud of myself. I feel like I can leave that chapter behind me now. So to close it off I give you this:



Thats the pantry as I used to see it, and this:



The pantry as it is now, both literally and figuratively :)

Back to regular posting soon

xxx