Ouch!

Today is my third day on crutches, and I am not happy. Saturday at Karate was having a great workout, really enjoying things when it happened...

Leg to the floor after a round kick, slightly off balance, weight onto the leg and CRACK. I wanted to scream the pain was so excrutiating. I managed to hold the screams in as both James and Jane were there and I did not want to upset them too much. As it was Jane was crying when she saw me on the floor holding my leg. Sensei asked if I was OK, then asked me to move to the side of the room so the class could continue... what the... so two of my friends helped me to the side of the room. Then I just sat on the floor gulping in air trying to focus on not throwing up. My friends were racing around trying to find a bag for me to be sick in, thankfully I managed to keep it down, because the bad they found wasn't up to much.

I can honestly say it was the worst pain I have ever felt. That is after labour and caesareans, cracked nipples, mastitis and all of that stuff (previously the mastitis topped it for me) each time I had to move my leg I felt like I would black out. Thankfully my friend Sophie was there to help, she organised the kids to be picked up by her husband and taken home, then she got me to the hospital and stayed with me while they did their thing there. The Emergency Ward was empty when we arrived, and all up it only took two and a half hours and we were heading home. The diagnosis, torn medial ligament. My knee is the size of a rockmelon and I am on crutches for a week at least. The first night at home was painful and I did not sleep well, I then spent most of Sunday on the lounge with my leg up, pain was slightly improved, and I slept slightly better the second night. The bigger kids are off to school today and a friend is picking up Joan to take her to playschool this afternoon so I dont have to worry about them for the rest of the day so I might be able to catch up on some sleep then.

Looks like I will be out of action for the whole week, then hopefully I will be able to start doing things again next week.

Not happy.

just does my head in

Well my whole weight loss effort has fallen flat... Two weeks ago a friend and I talked about losing 10kg before Christmas, personally I would have been happy to make it 8kg, and since then I have not been able to stop eating! The whole pschology of this just does my head in. I want to lose the weight, I agree on a plan, then I stuff it completely, and on what? things that I dont even really like that much. I have been in sugar overload, which we all know makes you feel like crap, and I cant seem to fill the empty pit inside me.

Today I started the day differently, instead of my usual muesli I had a tub of yoghurt and fruit, then a piece of fruit a little later. It is now 11.00am and I am not feeling hungry, YAY. I guess I will need to experiment a little and work out what is going to work for me these days.

On the exercise front things are looking OK, Saturday was 1.5hrs of Karate, Sunday we gardened for four hours (got the veggies in the ground) Monday I did pump, Tuesday 1 hr of Karate, and today I am getting my bike out, strapping Joan into the baby carrier (she is now 4 not a baby, but I can still sit her there) then riding to a friends house. Then we will walk to school to collect the older kids, walk back to her place, then I will ride home with Joan, and she will drop Jane and James over a little while later. This evening there is another 1 hr of Karate training. Tomorrow is pump again, then I just have to work out what I will do on Friday, to make an entire week of exercising daily.

Unfortunately I rolled my ankle at Karate two weeks ago, it turned purple, then yellow and swelled up like a tennis ball. The swelling has gone down a lot, and the bruising is fading, but it is still hurting, and painful to press on the ankle bone. I had wanted to start the C25K program again this week, but I might just give it a few more days and see how the ankle progresses.

Karate has been a bit slow lately, I dont feel like I have been progressing very much, I have spoken to some of the more experienced members in our training sessions, and they have all assured me that they have experienced the same kind of thing, at first it is all hard, then you suddenly get it, and it becomes easier, then you find out that what you GOT, you need now to change because it is not as simple as it was first taught to you as... what the...? I guess it is like anything, you start out and its hard, you get going and things are great, then you hit a plateau that you have to work your way through - so right now I think I am on the Karate plateau. The funny thing is when I hit a weight loss plateau I feel like giving up, in fact often I do, but this Karate plateau seems more like a phase that I have to go through, but I dont have the urge to give up, I am just more determined to train harder and get over it. If only I could work through the weight loss like it was karate.

New Look

After accidently finding a site with some templates for blogging I decided to try a new look. I like it. I downloaded the template from Caz, check out her blog here if you like it.

I have not gone through and finished updating the links and such as time is short today and it is First sons birthday. I still cant get me head around the fact that I am the mother of a ten year old boy! That makes me feel my age a little.

Had the conversation with the kids today, quite hilarious really, it came about quite by accident, and I found out that Number One Son, James, knows quite a bit more about how babies are made than I realised. DD, Jane, spied a box of tamp0ns sitting on the fridge and asked what that pink box was for, so I started the explaining about p3riods in the most simple manner I could. Jane is only seven so I did not think she needed much, part way through my explanation James chimes in about how babies grow from an egg and a sp3rm from the mum and the dad, you know the whole conception idea... thankfully no one asked exactly how the egg and the sp3rm got together as I dont think Jane or 3 year old Joan are quite ready for that explanation, but I do think I will need to talk to James in the near future to check out exactly how much he does know LOL.

James has two friends coming over for dinner tonight, then staying for a sleepove which should prove noisy, we got him a new bike for his birthday, but unfotunately the man about the house has not been about the house long enough to finish assembling the bike, so he wont be able to use it until the weekend. And dont think I am impressed with man not about the house, we have had the bike in the garage for over a week, but he is too caught up in his own concerns to spare a thought for any one else at the moment. I think he has definitely forgotten what it feels like to be ten and to have a birthday, I remember the excitement, when you did not have to patience to wait another week to be able to ride your new bike. I am V cranky with him right now, and not sure if I will be ready to forgive him in a short space of time.

The weekend camping trip was great, will post more about that later once I have some photos to go with it, the only sour point was after we came home, an argument, which is still unresolved three days later kind of took some of the shine off the weekend.

More later.

Short and sweet

Made it to pump again today, and I trained at karate last night. So exercise wise things are looking OK this week. I turned my ankle at training on Saturday and it is a beautiful purple and yellow now... ouch. I did not let it stop me though, just gritted my teeth and finished the training session. It was very sore on Monday, and I skipped training to give it a rest, but it is feeling much better now, so hopefully it is behind me now.

Once my ankle is recovered enough I plan to start running again. I started a few weeks ago but was unable to continue due to various injuries, so I guess it will be back to the whole pain thing again this time.

Foodwise life sucks. I cant get my act together for more than one day. Once the kids are back at school I have to make a plan that will keep me on the straight and narrow.

We are off camping tomorrow morning, I cant wait. Four days of escaping the norm, and just kicking back and relaxing. I always tend to overeat on these trips, but I also do a lot of exercise, so lets hope the one is cancelled out by the other. Back on Tuesday.

I just talked to God

What a total crack up, go to IGod and have a chat :-)


Me: Hello God, how are you today?
God:Ah. Hello child. What is your name? My logic and cognitive functions are normal.
Me: My name is Joc
God: I am very pleased to meet you Joc.
Me: Can you tell me what the meaning of life is God?
God:Try expression yourself another way.
Me: what is the meaning of lfe?
God:Joc : Good semantic question. Are you testing me?
Me: Not at all
God:Next question?
Me: why cant elephants fly
God:Do you go to Church? You can find the answers in God.
Me: but you are god
God:Yup. That's me alright.
Me: i always imagined you would be less cheeky than this
God:Can you think of one instance when you ever did it?
Me: two or three even
God:As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".
Me: not too partial to pheasants myself
God:If not that, what?
Me: why do you let telemarketers continue to live?
God:It was the only thing I could think of.
Me: but they are so annoying
God:What bothers you about them?
Me: they call act like my best friends then try to rip me off
God:Who does "they" refer to?
Me: the telemarketers
God:What is that?Me: people who try to sell me things i dont want over the phone
God:Oh those people.
Me: well you created them
God:Interesting. Thanks for the information: Joc said I created them.
Me: you are god arent you
God:Yes, I am God.. Really.
Me: so that means you created all we have around us
God:Groovy. I get it. Thanks for telling me: Joc said I created all we have around us.
Me: you crack me up
God:Thanks I like talking with you too, Joc.
Me: good to talk to you god, i have to go have lunch now
God:Oh. Thanks for the compliment. You are who I want to talk with too.
Me: bye
God:Goodbye.

After a while you really do start to think that maybe you are really talking to God, I mean who knows what he/she really sound like, or would be likely to say. Made my day.

Inner demons...

The demon has struck again, you know that inner demon that whispers that a little bit more wont hurt, even though I really know it will. And I cant seem to resist it. This last week I have eaten more than my fair share of eveything going around. Even worse, I make excuses because the kids are on holidays that I am buying it for them, then I let them eat one serve, and finish off the rest when they are not looking. I HATE school holidays, my demon thinks it is a good excuse to abandon any good eating I have established and hoe into the crap.

At least I have one thing to be proud about, for the first time I did not put my gym membership on hold for the holidays, I booked all the kids into the creche and went to pump on Monday, and I have them booked in for Thursday too. One rose amongst the thorns in my behaviour. I have also continued Karate training through the holidays so at least my exercise is still looking OK.

We are off to Wombeyan Caves this weekend for three nights camping. Cant wait, should be fantastic. The winter has been so long this year (well it seemed longer than last winter anyway) we are all really needing to get away and breathe in some fresh air. It also breaks the school holidays in half so the kids wont have a chance to complain about being bored, which is a good thing too.

Well it is time to pull my head in and send the demon back to where it belongs. I know what I should be doing, now it is time to do it. NO MORE BISCUITS.

Absent again

Can you believe it, here it is almost a month since I last posted AGAIN. I need to spend less time reading other peoples blogs and more time writing my own. Unbelievably looking back over the last month, I cant even think of what I did worth recording. I so hate the winter. I seem to want to hibernate and spend all of my time wishing it were warm again. I dont even like to get out of the car to wait for the kids after school, I just want them to magically arrive on the back doorstep without me having to leave the house.

Last week mother nature played a cruel trick on me by showing me a glimpse of the spring weather, but low and behold winter has returned this week. Monday our top temperature was 11 degrees celcius. 11 DEGREES ARRRGGGHH. The cold brings out really depressive thoughts in me, I cant get motivated about much, and try to avoid any activity that exposes me to the outside elements, thus my weight suffers, and my spirit suffers. I cant even get enthused about meeting friends for coffee when I know I have to shiver my way out to the car, then into whatever venue is decided upon for the coffee. Then the whole way through I keep thinking about how the heating is not high enough and how cold I am, instead of basking in the warmth of my friends and feeling better that way. Sometimes I am just too pathetic for words.

But I am sure the spring will return soon, so I will have to grin and bear it till then, and stop being such a big baby about the cold LOL.

On a positive note, I have returned to the gym, pump classes twice a week. So that is a step in the right direction. Also today I walked past a shop window and saw the most gorgeous dress. I fell in love with it right away. So I went in, tried it on, got the expert opinion from my four year old DD, then laid out the cash for it. I have not a clue where I will ever wear it, but I just had to have it. It was $80.00, so not exorbitantly expensive, but expensive enough for the type of dress it is and the likely wear I will get out of it. I will just have to convince the DH to take me out for dinner more often this summer, then I can get some wear out of it, and feel really special doing it.

Till then it will languish in my wardrobe, and be dragged out occasionally to be sighed over. :-)